The church and the Christian

'I don't have to go to church to be a Christian.' I can't tell you how often I've heard people say that, and the fact that 69% of the UK say they're Christian but only 3% go to church on any given Sunday shows that this is what most people think.
Why do people think like that?
First, they don't understand what a Christian is: they think it's about being nice, and you don't have to go to church to be nice!
Second, they don't understand what the church is: they assume that the church is something you do if you want to add religion to your niceness.
Third, there is a consumerist attitude to church: if there's something I'd prefer to do - something that is more immediately enjoyable - I'll do that instead of church.
Fourth, there is no doubt that many people are put off church by previous bad experiences. Sad, but true.
Fifth, someone who thinks being a Christian is just about being nice, will not want to give their all to praising the Lord Jesus Christ. They won't want to meet with Spirit-filled believers for prayer, they won't want to hear God's word explained and applied to their lives.
There are, I'm sure, many other reasons. But now let's look at how we might answer the person who says, 'I'm a Christian, but I don't need to go to church.'
First of all, it's not usually helpful to be confrontational. This person is sympathetic towards the faith, so we need to get alongside them and walk with them into church, not be a barrier to them.We want to win them, not repulse them.
Second, we must remember that we're not united to Christ by attending church, rather we are the church because we're united to Christ by faith.

So we could talk about how to be a Christian is to be a member of the body of Christ (1 Cor 13:12ff) and that we're missing an important part of the body if they're not with us. Yes, this makes the assumption that they are a Christian, but that's their claim and we're running with it for now in the hope that it will become so.
Or we could talk about how Christians are united to one another and to God (John 17) in a deep and profound way, and so they will surely want to be together so that they can obey Jesus' command to love fellow believers in a special way. The problem with this argument is that they think they already do love their fellow Christians because, after all, each of the nice people they love and care for is a Christian (according to their way of thinking).
In 1 Peter 2, we read that Christians are a 'chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God'. We could therefore talk about our responsibilities as God's special people, and the privileges that we enjoy.

However, these are all but parts of a bigger picture. In his excellent book, 'Remaking a Broken World' Christopher Ash shows how God's big plan from the fall to the new heavens and new earth is to unite the world under Christ.
The reason people don't want to meet together is that sin breaks relationships and forces us into smaller and smaller ghettos. The Bible word for this is 'scattering' - God's judgment on sin is to scatter and disperse people (e.g. Gen 11:1ff; Gen 49:7; Lev 26:27-33; Psalm 44 etc etc). But salvation is 'gathering'. When God saves his people he brings them together - in the OT around the mountain, tabernacle or temple and, in the NT, around Jesus. And always his people gather to hear God's word and to worship him together. (e.g. Psalm 102; Isa 11:12; 40:11). All of this is summed up in Nehemiah 1:8-9

Remember the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying, ‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples, but if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though your outcasts are in the uttermost parts of heaven, from there I will gather them and bring them to the place that I have chosen, to make my name dwell there.’

In the NT, Jesus says that he will gather his people together:

His winnowing fork is in his hand, and he will clear his threshing floor and gather his wheat into the barn, but the chaff he will burn with unquenchable fire.      Matt 3:12

Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.  Matt 12:30.

And he will send out his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.  Matt 24:31

 And then, in Revelation, all the nations gather round the throne of Jesus the Lamb to worship him:  

And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea, and all that is in them, saying, “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be blessing and honor and glory and might forever and ever!”    Rev 5:13

All of this is summed up in Ephesians 1:7-10 &22

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.

 And so we return to the church. Christ is given to the church as its head and as the ruler of all things. In him alone do we discover the fullness of God and the fullness of the purpose of our creation.
Christians will be with each other and with the Lord Jesus forever. More than that, we will be united in love for one another and love for Jesus forever. So we might as well start loving and enjoying each other now. Eternity is a mighty long time!
And th sting in the tail is that if we don't enjoy Jesus and his people now, we won't enjoy him and them in eternity.